Fair enough

Assalamualaikum dear readers,

I really want to share with you a reality that happen to me, us, our family. It is also a prove that Allah is the Most Justice and Most Merciful.

I'm sure most of us have different kind of neighbors, I have two type, immediate neighbors, on my left, and on my right. Both neighbors have different background in terms of educational, nationalities and thinking abilities. One side treat us like we are some kind of garbage and try to bring us apart, blaspheme us, frequently tease us intentionally to make us upset so that they can start a fight, so on and so forth, everything that you can imagine not to have one. But on the other side, they treat us like we are guests to them, always helping, caring, kind-hearted, understanding, humble and adorable family and everything that you can imagine to have a neighbor like that. 

Fair enough isn't it?

I believe Allah put us in the middle so that we, our family lives in reality, that you can't get everything that you ever wanted in this world. I believe Allah has planned so well that Allah did not want us to be ungrateful and I strongly believe that this is the way Allah wants to test us and reward us. 

By knowing so, actually I really have a great neighborhood. Don't you think? It's just the matter of how you perceive it and how you mentally handle the situation. Obviously my hell-side neighbor is mentally or soul-sick but if we treat them like they treat us, we are just about the same. What we do is we seek protection from Allah. 

So, whatever you do or circumstances you are in, it's the matter of how you can change it either you want it to be positive or the other way around.

Palestin itu jauh dari kita

Pada kita derita itu
pada gagalnya peperiksaan
laparnya perut pada makanan
putusnya cinta pada kekasih pujaan
jauhnya ibu ayah dari dakapan
juga habisnya duit dalam bekalan


Pada mereka derita itu
apabila rumah kediaman digesel trak
harta benda serba serbi dirompak
maruah keluarga dipijak-pijak
anak bini dicincang oleh manusia tak berotak
tanah air Islam diinjak-injak

Irama kita
adalah suara siti yang merdu
atau muzik rock yang bingit melegakan
atau suara nasyid yang mendayu-dayu

Irama mereka
bulddozer yang menghiasi setiap pagi
ketulan batu yang dicampak ke muka yahudi
Bom yang tak pernah sunyi berbunyi

Sungguh sukar kita berada di tempat mereka
kita masih tak sanggup menerima ujian sedemikian mereka

Berpisahnya kita dari keluarga cuma sementara
berpisahnya mereka dengan ayah,ibu, adik beradik adalah buat selama-lamanya

Tangisnya kita di dunia adalah kerana gagalnya kita dalam ujian
putusnya cinta atau geramnya pada manusia
tangisnya mereka di dunia kerana tidak dapat membunuh musuh Allah
kerana gagalnya mereka menemui kesyahidan

Rindu kita hanya bauan pada keluarga tercinta
pada kekayaan melimpa ruah
pada umur yang panjang
agar keluarga kita lebih makmur membahagiakan

Rindu mereka pada wangian syurga tertinggi…
pada syahid tanpa henti
pada perjumpaan teragung
dengan Ilahi tercinta…

Siapakah kita berbanding mereka?

25 May 06
Muharikah

Kanak-kanak tak berdosa.. 

Keganasan berleluasa..

The Best of Friends

This poem goes to my dear friend

The best of friends,
are fellow travelers,
on the road of life

The best of friends,
change and grow,
with each other,
and learn,
through one another's,
experiences and lessons.

The best of friends can share,
the most insignificant,
and the most shining parts,
of themselves,
with the same degree,
of joy and openness.

The best of friends,
are friends for a lifetime-
like you and me.

These of late

Recently what I wrote was not as usual as before, I can say that it's not something intelligent to share with but I guess sometimes we do have these ups and downs in life that there are times we just need to let it out but at the same time didn't really know who to talk to or who can be trusted. This is the way I eased them, but again, as egoistical as I can be, I'm not going to let you know what is actually happen to me. Nevertheless, I cracked few hints that will make you have the idea what's going on.

I do have something else much worth to be shared as some sort of 'policies' I applied to this blog but I guess it depends on my mood. For now, I'm in the middle of inner-crisis and need to do some soul-searching.

Peace out.

Doing just fine

Assalamualaikum dear readers,

As I write this, I actually don't really have an idea what's the next line would be but I'm just gonna scribble it out anyway. 

There's a few things that you have to know about myself that I am a kind of person who would think carefully before I make a big(or small) decision, even if wanting to say 'hi' to a friend in the list of my friends chat list on fb. And I'm a kind of person who won't be deceived by what my heart says, I took a deep, and intense considerations before making any decision, it concludes the consequences as well as the benefits, loss, and everything in between. See, I'm a very tact in term of those matters. 

Thus, when somebody try to give me advise on how to treat others, or how to handle or manage a relationship that he/she don't even been in my shoes for a second or merely even know me, I seriously like to give him/her a high-five. In the face. With a chair. Made of steel. Hahaha. Seriously. 

Actually I'm overwhelmed and touched by these people's concern towards me about my failed relationship(s), but thanks, I'm doing just fine. 

I'd rather be single than be in wrong relationship (or person).


I'm doin' just fine,

I bruise easily

My skin is like a map
Of where my heart has been
And I cant hide the marks
Its not a negative thing
So I let down my guard
Drop my defences down by my clothes
I'm learning to fall
With no safety net to cushion the blow

I bruise easily
So be gentle when you handle me
Theres a mark you leave
Like a love heart carved on a tree
I bruise easily
Can't scratch the surface
Without moving me underneath
I bruise easily
I bruise easily

I found your fingerprints
On a glass of wine
Do you know you're leaving them
All over this heart of mine too
But if I never take this leap of faith
I'll never know
So im learning to fall
With no safety net to cushion the blow

Anyone who can touch you
Can hurt you or heal you
Anyone who can reach you
Can love you or leave you

So be gentle...

I bruise easily
I bruise easily

Fall

Don't find love, 

Let love find you,

That's why it's called

Falling in Love

because you don't force

yourself to fall,

You just fall

Once in a blue moon

Suddenly... This feeling, of unwanted feeling, maybe a gift from Him, come to me once in a blue moon. This unwanted feeling is, for me, an infatuation phase which always deceit my conscious mind to be in idling mode. Not a good feeling though, in long terms.

You most probably couldn't understand this what more to relate. Thus, I am so sorry for wasting your time reading my scribble.

Lost awhile in Lailatul Qadr

Assalamualaikum, first and foremost before I start. 

Yeah, its been awhile since I left this blog. I don't simply write if I don't have an entry that can beneficently shared among us. There's a lot to write so does to keep to myself. A lot of questions unanswered, situations unexplained, and tangles untangled. Today is the 27th of Ramadhan, I don't know where to put the benchmark of quality if been compared to last year or previous years. As previous year I'd shared benefits of  solat tarawikh every night and I even wrote an entry about Ramadhan but this year I'm just focusing myself towards devoting myself towards Allah. And yet, it comes to my mind a few questions, 'have I reached my target? Did I devoutly remorse what have I done? What had I gain? Did I obtain bless from Allah? His forgiveness? And I keep on wander these questions in my mind. 

I just hope, no, I really really want Allah to soften and cleanse my heart, be it by decontaminate or disinfect by fumigating or other thousand ways doing it. I just don't know how, anymore. A lot of assiduous had been put in fighting heart 'diseases' but it comes to no avail. I thought this is the month where all the devils had been entangle thus a perfect time for me to change, maybe I did a little bit but I can feel it's not enough. 

So if anyone know a way, please please please tell me how.. I am so desperate that sooner or later I'll become a desperado. (Just kidding). Maybe a desperado of wanting to be good? Haha. Err, didn't it sound ironic? 

Anyway, I would like to share you one more thing. I think, maybe, (this is what I felt), last night was night of Lailatul Qadr. The night was so serenely peaceful like those signs they (ulama's) said. And yet, I was questioning myself again, did I get the night that is better than thousands months? -_-

Let's practice this d'ua before it's too late

Ramadhan... I hope, wish, and pray, we'll meet again next year, Insya Allah.. You'll be dearly missed.. T-T

Online Banking Fraud

I'd received an email last few weeks asking me to verified my account. Fortunately I've been hearing this kind of cases quite a number so I don't buy the trick. After a while of so-called investigating, I found out that there are few things that are not right about this. By not clicking the link, I would like very much to reveal what are the scam they're trying to apply. Below is the pictures that tells a thousand words. Enjoy! =P

The email.

Let me break it down for you.

• The email is from m2u@maybank2u.com.my which supposedly should be m2u@maybank.com.my, there is no '2u' after maybank word.
• I think the sentence is not complete. 'As requested, we're writing to let you know that your Maybank2u Online Banking.'  What??? Let me know what? And usually formal letter do not use apostrophe (the ' punctuation mark).
• Notice that I highlighted the 'need to verified', it is actually the fraud. By verifying your account through the link they've given will directly lead them to your account. This is very dangerous once you've click the link as you've given them access to your account as well as your details i.e full name, address, IC number, etc.
• Always remember the notice maybank2u Security Tips once you enter the webpage, manually type the online banking address.

Notice when you login to maybank2u.com

An experience from my cousin as she's new to the online banking back then; someone ask her by using maybank2u phone system to verified her IC number and she replied it and after a while she check her money in the bank has been stolen for a few hundred. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT verified anything when they ask you to do so, unless you're the one who contacted the bank. I believe that this is not only happening to Maybank Berhad but also to any online banking system.

Quite cunning though. So, have a safe online banking everyone!

APA HEBATNYA SOLAT DI AWAL WAKTU?

Setiap peralihan waktu solat sebenarnya menunjukkan perubahan tenaga alam ini yang boleh diukur dan dicerap melalui perubahan warna alam.

 

Rasanya fenomena perubahan warna alam adalah sesuatu yang tidak asing bagi mereka yang terlibat dalam bidang fotografi, betul tak?

WAKTU SUBUH
Sebagai contoh, pada waktu Subuh alam berada dalam spektrum warna biru muda yang bersamaan dengan frekuensi tiroid yang mempengaruhi sistem metabolisma tubuh.

Jadi warna biru muda atau waktu Subuh mempunyai rahsia berkaitan dengan penawar/rezeki dan komunikasi.

Mereka yang kerap tertinggal waktu Subuhnya ataupun terlewat secara berulang-ulang kali, lama kelamaan akan menghadapi masalah komunikasi dan rezeki.

Ini kerana tenaga alam iaitu biru muda tidak dapat diserap oleh tiroid yang mesti berlaku dalam keadaan roh dan jasad bercantum (keserentakan ruang dan masa) - dalam erti kata lain jaga daripada tidur.

Di sini juga dapat kita cungkil akan rahsia diperintahkan solat di awal waktu.

Bermulanya saja azan Subuh, tenaga alam pada waktu itu berada pada tahap optimum.

Tenaga inilah yang akan diserap oleh tubuh melalui konsep resonan pada waktu rukuk dan sujud.

Jadi mereka yang terlewat Subuhnya sebenar sudah mendapat tenaga yang tidak optimum lagi.

WAKTU ZOHOR
Warna alam seterusnya berubah ke warna hijau (Isyraq & Dhuha) dan kemudian warna kuning menandakan masuknya waktu Zohor.

Spektrum warna pada waktu ini bersamaan dengan frekuensi perut dan hati yang berkaitan dengan sistem penghadaman.

Warna kuning ini mempunyai rahsia yang berkaitan dengan keceriaan.

Jadi mereka yang selalu ketinggalan atau terlewat Zuhurnya berulang-ulang kali dalam hidupnya akan menghadapi masalah di perut dan hilang sifat cerianya.

Orang yang tengah sakit perut ceria tak?

WAKTU ASAR
Kemudian warna alam akan berubah kepada warna oren, iaitu masuknya waktu Asar di mana spektrum warna pada waktu ini bersamaan dengan frekuensi prostat, uterus, ovari dan testis yang merangkumi sistem reproduktif.

Rahsia warna oren ialah kreativiti.

Orang yang kerap tertinggal Asar akan hilang daya kreativitinya dan lebih malang lagi kalau di waktu Asar ini jasad dan roh seseorang ini terpisah (tidur la tu).

Dan jangan lupa, tenaga pada waktu Asar ni amat diperlukan oleh organ-organ reproduktif kita.

Peliharalah kamu (kerjakanlah dengan tetap dan sempurna pada waktunya) segala sembahyang fardu, khasnya sembahyang Wusta (sembahyang Asar), dan berdirilah kerana Allah (dalam sembahyang kamu) dengan taat dan khusyuk. ::Al-baqarah:238::

 

WAKTU MAGRIB
Menjelang waktu Maghrib, alam berubah ke warna merah dan di waktu ini kita kerap dinasihatkan oleh orang-orang tua agar tidak berada di luar rumah.

Ini kerana spektrum warna pada waktu ini menghampiri frekuensi jin dan iblis (infra-red) dan ini bermakna jin dan iblis pada waktu ini amat bertenaga kerana mereka resonan dengan alam.

Mereka yang sedang dalam perjalanan juga seelok-eloknya berhenti dahulu pada waktu ini (solat Maghrib dulu la) kerana banyak interferens (pembelauan) berlaku pada waktu ini yang boleh mengelirukan mata kita.

Rahsia waktu Maghrib atau warna merah ialah keyakinan, pada frekuensi otot, saraf dan tulang.

WAKTU ISYAK
Apabila masuk waktu Isyak, alam berubah ke warna Indigo dan seterusnya memasuki fasa Kegelapan.

Waktu Isyak ini menyimpan rahsia ketenteraman dan kedamaian di mana frekuensinya bersamaan dengan sistem kawalan otak.

Mereka yang kerap ketinggalan Isyaknya akan selalu berada dalam kegelisahan.

Alam sekarang berada dalam Kegelapan dan sebetulnya, inilah waktu tidur dalam Islam.

Tidur pada waktu ini dipanggil tidur delta di mana keseluruhan sistem tubuh berada dalam kerehatan.

QIAMULLAIL

Selepas tengah malam, alam mula bersinar kembali dengan warna putih, merah jambu dan seterusnya ungu di mana ianya bersamaan dengan frekuensi kelenjar pineal, pituitari, talamus dan hipotalamus.

Tubuh sepatutnya bangkit kembali pada waktu ini dan dalam Islam waktu ini dipanggil Qiamullail.

Begitulah secara ringkas perkaitan waktu solat dengan warna alam.

Manusia kini sememangnya telah sedar akan kepentingan tenaga alam ini dan inilah faktor adanya bermacam-macam kaedah meditasi yang dicipta seperti taichi, qi-gong dan sebagainya.

Semuanya dicipta untuk menyerap tenaga-tenaga alam ke sistem tubuh.

Kita sebagai umat Islam sepatutnya bersyukur kerana telah di’kurniakan’ syariat solat oleh Allah s.w.t tanpa perlu kita memikirkan bagaimana hendak menyerap tenaga alam ini.

Hakikat ini seharusnya menginsafkan kita bahawa Allah s.w.t mewajibkan solat ke atas hamba-Nya atas sifat pengasih dan penyayang-Nya sebagai pencipta kerana Dia tahu hamba-Nya ini amat-amat memerlukan-Nya.

Dan dirikanlah kamu akan sembahyang dan keluarkanlah zakat, dan rukuklah kamu semua (berjemaah) bersama-sama orang-orang yang rukuk. ::Al-baqarah:43::

Artikel ini dipetik dari facebook page Ust. Nasir yang saya kira sangat berguna untuk saya kongsi dengan anda semua untuk panduan dan sebagai peringatan kepada saya agar tidak melengah-lengahkan waktu solat dan terutama sekali agar tidak tidur selepas solat subuh.

Forgive me for being too 'nuha'

This entry was supposedly be published last month, but then again, same lame excuses I would like to present. Please don't misconcepts the title, it is not about nuha. The idea was derived from my conversation between me and my long-lost friend.

Friend: sekian lama tidak di dengari sebarang berita,bagaimana keadaanya anda??sehat sejahtera hendaknya..hahahaha

Me:      Baik², alhamdulillah.. Anda? Sekarang saya bekerja, agak sibuk, tapi semuanya under control lagi

Friend: anda sebuk??pernahkah anda tidak sebuk??hahaha..sebuk² pun,perot kena jaga,nanti kena gastrik lagi,masuk lagi hospital.

Me:     Hahaha. Good point there. Saya tak pernah tak sebuk, bertambah umur = bertambah sebuk. Damn. But yeah, gastric problem, never stops. I was hospitalized (again) last two years, hopefully next coming years takde lah. Serik. (Ceh, serik la sangat, poyo je)

Friend: masih nuha yang dulu..mungkin di dalam kamus dewan bahasa pustaka edisi ke 5 nanti akan di daftar perkataan nuha sebagai kata ganti untuk kesebukan yang tiada penghujung??hahaha..atau mungkin anda mahu membuat hospital itu sebagai rumah anda yang kedua??hahaha..

Me:     Oh, awesome betol kalau nuha jadi kata ganti nama untuk sebuk yang tiada berpenghhujung. Haha. Kalau camtu kamus dewan bahasa akan jadi dua kali ganda tebal? Sebab banyak lagi nama org yang sibuk dapat masuk dalam kamus dewan bahasa tu. Haha 

Friend: saya belum jumpa lagi orang yang 'senuha' anda..jadi andalah lambang 'kenuhakan' wanita bekerjaya..hahaha..dan disebabkan oleh 'kenuhakan' yang terjadi,anda telah mendaftar untuk menjadi pengunjung hospital yang tegar..jadi,moral of the story,jangan jadi 'nuha'..hahaha




Hahaha, he made out his point there. Maybe I was rushing life to stressful path. I should've taken life as a bless from Allah and embrace it to the fullest. 


Cheers!

If you think safety is expensive, try having an accident

Good day fellas. Haven't had merely an entry for two months is just because, as usual, I am full throttle towards my career I'm building now as well as health complication that I go through every single day especially morning.

Remember the accident that I had few months back? Well, it lead me to have breathing difficulties that I have these 3 months, every time I wake up, whether it is night, or morning or even when I take a nap, every time, without fail. At first I thought I'm going to die or I have a disease, maybe lungs problem and whatnot. I even google the symptoms that I had and bump into COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease). Not satisfied, I consult a few doctors to check what's going on with me and even had ECG test, luckily it turns out to be normal. After 4th visit to the doctors, I think they gave up and hand me a referral letter to specialist hospital.

Few of you who know me, I'm a kind of person who put career first, won't straight away go to the hospital just because I had this everyday-breathing-difficulties. Yup, I delay the appointment up to two weeks until one morning I hardly breath that I'm sure I'm going to die soon. On such a chaotic morning, after performing my Subh prayer, my dad rush me to the KPJ Specialist Hospital to find out more about my 'disease'.

The good thing about private hospital is they are very highly efficient, yeah, we pay them highly of course. In just a few hours, I've done ECG (again), blood test, urine test, X-ray, and CT scan, consults specialist cardiologist including warded me in two-bedded room. Before this I went to the government hospital and they've set my appointment which is on May, (wutta..?). But this is not to say anything bad about government hospital, I totally understand why they are less efficient.

The cardiologist, Dr Daud, didn't suspect me to have heart problem for such at young age, with small build, it can't be heart problem, same things to the lungs. So, if everything turns out to be normal, what is it actually? The very next morning, I was brought to see the specialist in orthopedics. Looking at the CT scanned and X-ray  results, is perfectly normal.

Suddenly, he, Dr. Robert zoomed in at the left ribs area and found out that there are fractured at the 8th and 9th ribs. He investigated me whether I had an accident or have I fall lately, yeah, only then I remembered that I had an accident last few month. Just imagine if a car is running about 90 or 100 km/h, and stopped abruptly with force, the inertia that the car is holding is quite an impactful, I suppose. Only now that it affected my respiratory system. He said most probably because I was skinny and the seat-belt must've been gripped my ribs subconsciously. I don't remember the seat-belt tucked me so hardly that it'd fractured my ribs, but the theory might be consistent with tragedy. Luckily, he said that the fractured ribs will recover by itself, time by time. Thus, for the time being, I shouldn't be so active, no more badminton, tennis etc..  ='(

I was hospitalized for three days, and been given MC for the rest of the week. My next appointment is next 7 days, and the bill is RM2,475.90. So, relate the title with the bill ya. It's not about the bill itself but also the medical leaves I've consumed, the breathing difficulties and the self-assumption that I've made which had sometimes, trigger the subconscious panic in my brain, I mean, who wants to have a chronic disease and die when you're not ready, right?

A week medical leave

Therefore, lesson to be learned;

• Safety is not a thing that you can compromise
• Health come first than career ( I remembered Zach told me about this and he went on elaborate it) :)
• Do not delay if you feel something wrong with your body, it might've threaten your life
• Don't go and have your self-assumption that you have this and that diseases, just go and seek consultation from a doctor or two

Till we meet again! Assalamualaikum.

Egotistical

Egotist; iː.gəʊ .tɪst (also egoist)
Definition: excessively conceited or absorb in oneself; self-centered. According to Cambridge Advance Learner Dictionary ; a person who considers themselves to be better or more important than other people.

If you've come across this entry, most probably you'll define me as humbled and whatnot, or at the very least, you'll reckon that I'll improve in my driving skills especially after what had happened to me. Atleast I thought I was. But I'm not.

Last weeknight, I took my younger sisters to my colleague's open house, and I gave them some tips (yeah, like I'm THAT good in driving) but end up they give me a lecture on how my driving skill really is. They said I'm driving viciously. I said, "no, I'm not, this is my driving skill, this is the way I drive and this is the way dad taught me, I'm getting used to it". The conversation that almost began to fuss go on as my youngest sister, 12, starting to say her opinion by telling me that riding with me is not smooth and enjoying, always action and drama going on every single time I give them a ride (okay she might exaggerating a lil bit). So that was less or more of the juicy journey on the way back.

Things I really can't forget what my sister told me is that when I was denying that I drive more less like fast and furious action movie was "you've been into an accident before, and yet you still drive like it never happened, you should atleast improve or be more careful next time around", I replied her like "I know what I'm doing and you don't have your hands on the wheel, you don't know what/how it feels, we'll see how you drive once you own a car". After so much denying and disapproving statements and facts being laid upon me, she later on added, "wow, such an egoistical you are".

...........silence...........

Silence = thinking

Yeah, I guess I am an egotistical kind of person. The egotism that my mom has always try to put away from me since I was a little kid is like filing rust on steel, the steel become stainless when you keep on filing it but when you don't, it'll 'grow' even worse.

The thing is that I cannot accept the complaints from someone who is younger than me or someone who does not have the knowledge in the field of what they're talking about. The brutal truth hurts, it really does, and yeah, I'm quite a wreckless driver, I don't deny it but I just can't confront it in front of them.


The question now is: when am I going to change? ~.~"

Luahan perasaan pada Tuhan

Memetik dari blog kenalan saya, Ajwad, dibawah ini ialah cebisan kata dari Ustaz Hasrizal Abdul Jamil di facebooknya.


"Banyak meluahkan perasaan kepada Tuhan, kita kurang mendapat jawapan tetapi banyak mendapat ketenangan. Banyak meluahkan perasaan kepada manusia, kita banyak mendapat jawapan tetapi semakin kurang beroleh ketenangan."


Memang benar. Hakikatnya Allah juga yang amat menenangkan hati. Bercakap dengan Allah walaupun tiada balasan, tetapi beroleh ketenangan yang tidak mampu diungkap.

"(Iaitu) orang-orang yang beriman dan tenang tenteram hati mereka dengan "zikrullah". Ketahuilah dengan "zikrullah" (mengingati Allah) itu, tenang tenteramlah hati manusia."

Ar-Rad: 28

Biar Allah sahaja yang memujuk hati ini. Dunia ini negara ujian. Tidak sunyi dengan mehnah dan tribulasi. Hati diuji bukan sekali dua, tetapi acapkali malah menyerang dari pelbagai sudut. Disitu perlunya ada hubungan hati dengan Allah yang sangat kuat. Sumber tenaga hati yang tidak putus. Dalam usaha menyediakan hati untuk manusia, jangan melupakan tuntutan untuk bawa hati ini 'bermanja' dengan Allah SWT. Dialah Tuhan kita. Dialah yang menciptakan hati kita. Lalu dimana selayaknya kita serahkan diri dan minta tolong?

"Engkaulah sahaja (Ya Allah) Yang Kami sembah dan kepada
Engkaulah sahaja kami memohon pertolongan."

Al-Fatihah: 5

Petikan dari blog Kembali PadaMu

Somebody . . .

Somebody taught me to be in control,
Somebody taught me to kiss away all the interpretations,
Somebody taught me that everything's gonna be fine,
Somebody taught me to live in reality,
Somebody taught me to dig the source of my uncertainty.

Somebody had uncover me from my past,
history I kept inside for years,
Somebody had vanish the shield,
my armor of strength,
Somebody had enlighten me to see things in different perspective,
which I misconception about,
Somebody had acknowledge me as committed and trustworthy,
which no one ever did before,
Somebody made me gain my inner strength,
somehow.

Somebody edify me by being organize,
Somebody edify me by coordinating my stuff,
Somebody edify me by improving myself.

Somebody taught me to be humble and moderate,
Somebody told me that it's okay to be vulnerable,
that I should seek for help and consultants if things go wrong
for we are human, not mutant,
Somebody taught me that there is always choices in life,
Either bad or good,
Somebody told me to be myself.

I thank Allah for sending me that somebody. Somebody that I used to know.

Things you can and can't control (Management Pt 1)

Assalamualaikum fellas. Hope you're in the pink of health.

Today, I would like to write about things you can and can't control. 


Let me give you a situation. You have a car, you usually going places by car, and one day your car breakdown and needed to send to the workshop. Having little choice, you opt for train to commute you to your office. You are late, the door of a coach is about to close, you push the button near the door to open it. Once you're safely in the coach, thousands (okay I might exaggerate it a bit, maybe hundreds or less) of eyes are looking at you as if they wanna eat you alive. (Remember, this situation is not an usual norm for you)

What is on your mind? 

~ Why is everybody looking at me like I'm half-naked?

~ What's wrong with my attire? Is there coffee spilt on my silk shirt?

~ Am I aboard the wrong train or coach?

~ Why do they looking at me?

~ What wrong have I done?

The list go on and on. And you started looking for your phone or mag or anything to distract the questions in your head. 

The real thing is, it's just you do the thinking, everybody else have their business on their minds. They don't really bother the creature who just entering the coach shortly out of breath. Psychologically, you're the one is still moving and you have accidentally attracted the attention of people in the train (just for a second though). 

That was a simple situation. Things that you can actually control because it's your mind playing tricks on you. I have a real situation that I don't usually let my mind do the tricks on me, but it got me thinking absurdly.  

I met a bunch of great mind people, when I'm around them, I always feel like I'm the least intellectual, less confident and I down-graded myself (wutta...?) BUT still, I have the guts to tell one of them bout it. And here's what he response:

"Why are you feeling so? You shouldn't feel like that. It's only you think it that way. We never judge you like you're the least intellectual. There are things that you can control and things you can't control. Like your parents, you can't choose who your parents are, they're gifted. But this, (the demoralize thingy), you can control. If you think people are judging you that way, control it, prove them wrong, read a lot of books, do bunch of research, converse and discuss, so you gain more knowledge, right? You see, there's always choices for us to make. It's whether we want to change it or not.."

There you go, a short advice, but a very precise. Thank you Mr. H. ('',)

End of Management Pt 1 (What? There is Management Pt 2? Yes, TBContinue..)

Comeback Pt 3 (Makmal Fikir [Thinklab©])

Excited. Okay. Take a deep breath. Breath in.

Commitments, a word that I used to be afraid of. Not anymore, since now I met a bunch of awesome people last month. Yeah, as I said in the Comeback Pt 1, a roller coaster is a fun ride! What are you talking about? I know, getting confuse huh? Let me spell it out for you.

The commitments I'm talking about is not about getting attach to any relationship but I'm now an agent of change for thinklab© and I challenge myself to do podcast. Podcast is a radio programme that is stored in a digital using signals in the form of numbers form that you can download from the Internet and play on a computer or on an MP3 player. I'm challenging myself because I am an introvert kind of person. By putting myself in this commitment, I hope that I will gain more knowledge and the most important thing is I boost up my confident level a lil bit higher. Now that I am the assistant for the new upcoming event, Agents of Change Program - MAKMAL© Series, I hope to build communication skills.  

Owh, before I forget, please excuse me, and give a big applause to Dinah Rakhim for introducing me to this thinklab©. 

Just to share with you that thinklab© is not just a social network page (FB), or webpage but more than that. We (the agent of change where these cool people are) will meet every Saturdays at around 10am, and we'll talk and discuss, and the most crucial part is we make things happen. The target is to be the 1st design platform in Malaysia, may not be the best but we want to be the bridge to the world out there and to create awareness of how important design is, what design capable of, what design can solves, the list go on and on. 

Its a pleasure for me to come every week despite the fun I've missed hanging out with my friends, it's because I  get the chance to 'work' my brain(s) out, in a very relaxing ambiance and 'sempoi' way. They are very cool and  welcoming. I love the positive vibes they spread, the jovial laugh, the old-school style, the awesomeness and the great minds to be hang out with. Yeah, they are from different background, architecture, industrial, interior, free lancer, media, designer, graphic, you name it but we will find one point so that everybody can meet eye to eye. It always does. We'll find solutions, in fact, they have a lively spirit and a lot of enthusiasm and can often stay focused on a creative project and forget everything around them. An artistic personality type solves problems by creating something new. 

At the end of every session, we get to evaluate ourselves which we can see from time to time, where actually we are standing. What were happening, what is going on, and what are we intend to do for the next week, next month, next year, perhaps. It made me think, enormously most of the time, what I can do to contribute, what should I say, what I should not, how to make things work, etc.

Yep, I can read your mind, what do I get? This is a non profit organisation. I did it voluntarily. I know I may not gain anything but in matter of fact I gain so much and more. It's basically for my self establishment, but in the long terms, I get to build networks, confidence, and not forgetting trust. 

Should you find this article interesting enough and eager to join us, let me know and I am so very please to lead you the way. So, basically what Agent of Change will have is:

• Meeting : Every Saturdays (except if there are events or the management stated the other way around)
• Time     : 10.00am
• Venue   : TBC by admin
• Fees     : Free admission

Ps: it's not compulsory to attend every weekend, but there're a lot to be missed =P

Breath out.

Comeback Pt 2 (2011? No, 2012)

In the name of Allah , the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. New year. 2012. 

New resolutions? No, I say I'd enough resolutions last year and I plan to bring it forward as part of my cousin's advice as well. The fact that I reached few targets last year is really up-lifting my burden. All thanks to Allah, and my parents and families. I owe them big time. 

Part 2:

Anyway, looking back in the past year, 2011, the last tri-month (I'm not preggar, mind you =P), was awesome! I had an interview for a new job. The very next week, 2nd interview, and the very next month, the new company has given me a new lease of life! I am no longer working in the playground manufacturing company but event company where I got to explore new field of design. I am so grateful that they are willingly to 'risk' me in the company. And for that, to Allah I put on hopes and praise gratitude. 

It is a totally new environment, from the software, work space, working hours, work attire, working attitude, colleagues, etc. I thought all 3D softwares would be almost the same feature but this time around, I was totally wrong. I have to learn and clear my memory from the previous software skills (which is merely impossible since I have a good memory, masha Allah. Haha). Just imagine using a software that almost 3 years competently and now I have to change the whole thing, that's not a piece of cake, man. Nevertheless, this opportunity is like a dream comes true, and I will never go and throw this out of window. I will strive and make this happen for an opportunity doesn't knock twice. It's a kick-start for me as well to move on to a higher level. I know that I have to learn and work hard, but it's worth a try. 

Now that I'm in the chinese company, (previously was Malay), I have to survive on my own. There are little malay restaurants in the area, and finding a Halal restaurant is not easy-reach eventhough I'm still in Malaysia. Even so, I might have to drive to find Halal food and finding parking is really an issue since it's a commercial area. This has made me thinking how hard to survive oversea, and I have to salute those (as a Muslim) who can strive without you having had to be compromised with the regulations of Islam rule. My solution; bring food from home, which I try to make it a habit next week. (I might sound so exaggerate, yeah, I know it's not THAT HARD to find stall or restaurants serving Halal food, but I'm a picky eaters and I find it less options that lead me to the solution).

Surau, or praying room is not provided in the company. Well, there are only two Muslims including me, so I can sense that there are no reason they have to provide one, plus it's not a big company and we're all cramped up ourselves. Nonetheless, they are so very respectful that they allow us to perform our solat in the 2nd floor meeting room and if it's equipped, we can solat in hidden corner where none of them barely see us. They'll lower the voice tone and let us alone worshiping Allah. It is a shoes-off company for your information, so the floor is clean.

When it comes to colleagues, they are very helpful especially my department. I can't say enough  gratitude towards my colleagues named Epei, Joseph the Design asst manager and Kak Anis. They are very kindhearted willingly to teach me nearly everything I needed to know in this field. Thank you so very much. Thus, I'm hoping and praying that I will strive and sharpening my edge and skills towards better self-development this year. It sounds more like resolution though? No, it's my target. Haha.

1st day (early Christmas party)  

Me & Kak Anis

Owh, I can't wait to write Comeback Pt 3 where I meet a bunch of cool people; despite the project I brought from office to be completed by today! Tomorrow is the dateline submission. Freak out + excited.